Summer Adventure

Summer started last Friday. Well, maybe not for you, but as of Friday, May 20th we wrapped up our school year. A new completion date dictated by an opportunity, Girlie #1 and her Gamaw heading west for 10 days.

I love adventure. I love when my kids go on grand adventures. Since Girlie #1 would be leaving on a jet plane to one coast we thought the other two should join the party and jet to visit the other Grands. We put them on a plane and those Grands received them. I don't think we could send a more precious gift.

Of our three, only one was totally sold out to the adventure, rearing to go, no looking back. The other two, well, they feared what they might miss. Each came to me with concern in their tone, "Mom, I've never been away from you that long", and my heart swelled because I felt loved, needed. But, I've been careful not to squelch the joy of adventure in the desire to be needed. It's a tough scale to balance.

My response, "You'll be fine. You're going to have such a wonderful, full trip you won't have time to miss us", but, the boy would cling a little closer and keep giving me sweet love notes.

I've gotten calls. They call to check in, tell me what they've done and the sweetest thing-- when they ask what I've been up to. They say it in a disturbed sort of concern. I can tell they think there isn't anything  I could possibly have to do if they aren't here. It makes me laugh.

We are on separate adventures this week. I'm excited about our reunion, the day we come together and share what we've seen and done. That's my favorite part of being a family, I'm home all week but really I'm all over the U.S. because each member of this 'Party of 5!' is a carrier and wherever they go they infect the people they meet with the beauty and uniqueness of our little family.

Loving the Adventure:

942.
Girlie #1 and I playing 'Guess Who' in the car because her job is to keep me distracted while The Man and the others get the goods for my surprise.

943.
One Eighth a pound of Jamaican Blue Mountain Coffee because that's what a 10 year old can afford and she wanted to give the best and that 's the best.

945.
A torn piece of paper flying through the car, landing in my lap and I unfold the small paper plane to reveal the sweetness of a little boy's heart.

951.
Cool Florida Morn with Cool Breezes.

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The cleaning properties of Tri Sodium Phosphate.

958.
Quiet girlie talks as I prep her sweet face and hair to withstand the rigors of recital.

959.
Rib crushing hugs from growing kids.

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Seeing clean dishes and laundry thanks to above mentioned TSP.

How to Drive a Stake Part 1

In days of B.C. (before children) The Man would jokingly say that each child birthed would receive a pick axe and a shovel as their welcome into this world. To this day when they begin the incessant questions about birthday gifts this is his go to response. It drives the kids crazy. I just laugh.

There are tools my children really need. Some of these tools I'm just now learning to wield.

When we hurled ourselves into the whole 'spearhead your child's education' thing I felt lost. I researched the bazillion books and conventions, blogs and websites that offer insight. Frustration ran deep as the more insight I researched the more questions I had.

Answers started coming with my first read by John Taylor Gatto. I felt misgivings about the education I'd received. I partook of a 'Top Notch' education including private schools, an Advanced Diploma from a top rated high school and several years in a prestigious private college. But, I still felt the education I'd received left much to be desired. To me it seemed I received pieces of paper (diplomas) almost just for showing up. Gatto put all my thoughts and concerns in black and white and stamped them as valid.

While Gatto called out today's educational system and exposed its rotting foundation, I found in Oliver De Mille's writings hope and a game plan I could implement in my children's education.

He describes three major types of schooling:

Conveyor Belt

Professional 

Leadership 

To be truthful the United States education system is filling two types well. The Man and I have been trained by the school system in Conveyor Belt and Professional. We have been told how to think, what to think and when.

Don't believe me then get a hold of this video on textbook writers:

 Fox News Reporting, "Do You Know What Textbooks Your Children Are Really Reading?"

 

You can watch a bit of the video here (segment 2):
(check out Youtube to view other segments)


Education woes in the U.S. are due in part to it's missing group, the one education model that has been sorely neglected, Leadership Education. (The neglect has been purposeful but that's a post for another day, or start the research on your own with Gatto's book The Underground History of American Education or start reading at his website).

Leadership education in America is nearly extinct. This model of learning's primary purpose is teaching how to think. It prepares one to lead. Lead in their homes, towns, businesses. Become Entrepreneurs, Problem Solvers, people who instinctively know the right thing to do and have the ability to follow it through to completion, doing it well.

At the heart of Leadership Education is Freedom:

...leadership preparation, which has three primary goals. First, its purpose is to train thinkers, leaders, entrepreneurs and statesmen--individuals with the character, competence and capacity to do the right thing and do it well in business, government, church, school, family, entertainment, research and other organizations.

The second goal is to perpetuate freedom, to prepare people who know what freedom is, what is required to maintain it, and who exert the will to do what is required. These two goals are accomplished by the third: teaching students how to think. Those who know how to think are able to lead effectively and are able to help society remain free and prosperous. Those who know only what to think or when, no matter how valuable their contributions to society, are not capable of maintaining freedom or leading us to real progress without additional leadership skills.

~A Thomas Jefferson Education By Oliver De Mille

It is Leadership Education that creates great businessmen, statesmen in government and it built this Republic we call home. This is how Thomas Jefferson and our founding fathers were educated. This is the education I want for my children.

Having an education background in the models of Conveyor Belt and Professional I find training Leaders a sort of dual enrollment. I learn right alongside my students. I cannot instruct my children in the ways to drive a stake through the vampire of the American Dream if they do not know how to think for themselves.

Understanding education, the different models, and how they groom people to specific purposes is the first step in educating my children to live a Radical life. It is a tool I give them and side by side we are learning to wield it.

A Wallflower for Mother's Day

This Mother's Day I get to be celebrated in my most favorite way. I will be taking a back seat, standing in the corner, holding up a wall while all eyes are on The Boy, my only boy.

My long history of people pleasing has left Mother's day, a day where my investments are meant to be celebrated, feeling like a boxing match inside my heart. I don't know how to rest and I don't know how to be celebrated. I like to quietly do my thing and then stand in the corner and watch how it affects those for whom it was intended.

I like to educate my children and stand back and watch as they run with their new found knowledge. I love to plan the party, create beauty and offer it up as a sacrifice of joy for you to enjoy. But, please, I beg, just let me sit quietly on the sidelines and bask in the glow of your joy. I like to write quiet notes, uplifting words and offer them as gifts to my intended. My heart explodes with jubilation when I see you have a need and I meet it before you even realize it.

It is because of this struggle to be celebrated when I want to be the wallflower and this natural bent to do for others in my bizarre sideline manner, linked with my unhealthy method of pleasing people that makes Mother's Day such an internal battle. On Mother's Day I want to lay on the couch and fall asleep. Yes, wake me when it's over.

This year The Boy celebrates his birthday on Mother's Day, born on a Mother's Day. I loved it. In a small room I went to work. My stomach hardened with contracting pain, and with The Man and my Mom at my side, I pushed him into the world. What a glorious day. As he drew breathe, preparation to announce his arrival, screaming into the room, all eyes turned to him. Exactly the way I'd have it. Visitors came. All who entered the room making quick eye contact and then beginning the scan, the search for the newborn, making steps toward him, drawn to his new life.

Each year, as I age and mature, I embrace this sideline, wallflower heart. I thank the Lord for this trait. I hold it close and develop it. I ask him to continue me on this road. This road, where I am used as hands to meet the need, offer the gift of the party, write words to soothe a heart. My prayer for you, The Receiver;  As you scan the room and we make eye contact, toss me a smile but continue your scan. If you do you will find him, waiting with open arms to embrace you. And as you are held, you'll again catch my eye. I will be in my favorite place, sitting on the sideline basking in your joy, celebrating the delight of seeing you in the arms of our Heavenly Father.

He said, "Don't be afraid. I know you're looking for Jesus the Nazarene, the One they nailed on the cross. He's been raised up; he's here no longer. You can see for  yourselves that the place is empty.  Now -- on your way. "      The Message Mark 16:6-7

I am wishing you a very Happy Mother's Day!